the blogosphere says what?

(The following is a parody, aimed at no one in particular)

Hey ya'lls. I know, it's been a long time, but I've been soooo busy at my new job. I'm the diversity coordinator at Diversity Today, the magazine for professionals in the diversity industry. I take my job super serious, which can be exhausting, but fortunately we get 30 mental health days a year. I've already used 10 of them, mostly because of Heath Ledger's passing. Just typing his name makes me emotional.

Anyways, we were discussing black history month in the break room today, which got me thinking: Why is there no Gay History Month? The more I thought about it, the more underrepresented I felt. Think about it -- there's not even a Gay History Day! Well, I plan on taking off work to celebrate Harvey Fierstein's birthday this year, and it better not count against my vacation time.

But who can think about vacations at a time like this? When I think about how much my community is hated, I start weeping. I broke down at work today, but fortunately my employer tolerates crying. It's encouraged, even. Everyone in our office is so understanding, except Stan, the old guy who I can tell doesn't like me. Obviously he has a thing against homosexuals, though he claims to be a huge Barbra Streisand fan. However, he says he doesn't much care for, and I'm quoting, "that Madonna tramp!"

Having serious doubts about his commitment to diversity and tolerance, I recently authorized an internal investigation of Stan, and the early results are disturbing. For instance, he subscribes to Sports Illustrated, which barely covers the WNBA and the Gay Games. And what's with the Obama sticker on his car? Every gay person and every woman I know is voting for Hillary -- if you're against her, you're against gay and female equality. What other reason could you have for not supporting her?

But back to Gay History Month. I plan on networking with the other members of the Gay, Lesbian, Transgendered, Bisexual, Bi-curious and Gay-friendly Diversity Coordinators Association to brainstorm over when and how Gay History Month should be celebrated. For that matter, there should also be a Lesbian History Month, a Transgendered History Month, Bisexual History Month and Bi-Curious History Month. We're here, we're bi, gay-friendly and queer, and we won't be satisfied until we are properly recognized with a month, and it better not be one with less than 31 days!

*Celebrate Valentine's Day a week early with this blogosphere says what? classic.

Comments

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