ATLmalcontent

Dear Lord, Please Save My Sorry Ass

Today's prayer service for rain won't make Jesus very happy:

And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.

But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

(Matthew 6:5-6)

His displeasure is already evident, as Andisheh reports:

I will tell you this — when Scott Henry and I arrived at the service, it was overcast. When we left, the sky over the Gold Dome was blue.

As a side note, I've suggested that my editors here at the local organ rework the famous New York Daily News headline if we don't see significant rainfall within the week:

GOD TO PERDUE: DROP DEAD

On second thought, probably not a good idea -- Christian fundamentalists (including Sonny) may take it literally.

An Irrelevant Protest of an Irrelevant Event

A secular group said Friday it would protest Gov. Sonny Perdue's planned prayer service intended to ask for relief from the Southeastern drought, saying the rally violates the principle of separation of church and state.

Honey, I'm worried

What prompted Sonny Perdue's decision to order public water providers to cut usage by 10 percent? Al Kosa suspects the missus might've had something to do with it:

Scene: The Perdue's kitchen. Mary Perdue looks forlornly out the window at a parched yard. Sonny enters, ready for his traditional pork-heavy breakfast.

"Sonny, I had a dream last night of children diving into the creek and hitting their heads on the bottom because the creek's dry."

"I know honey. I'm against children breaking their necks, too. We're not gonna let it happen."

Ain't no Republicans in Atlanta

Among the reasons, I'm sure, that Gov. H. Dumpty vetoed a $40 million state grant to the Peachtree corridor project. The proposal would add streetcars as part of an overhaul of Atlanta's main thoroughfare.

God knows it's needed. But not as much as $19 million to promote fishing in Georgia.

Downtown remains the state's bastard, and it shows. 

Worst. Governor. Ever. (Okay, Lester Maddox was worse. And Tom Watson. But Sonny's in the top tier.) 

Gov. H. Dumpty's budget

In: $19 million for the governor's fishing tourism program, called "Go Fish Georgia."

Out: funding for the more-than-decade-old foreign language program in elementary schools. Several university, technical college and library projects also got the ax.

(Source)

The next Spiro Agnew?

Amazingly, Georgia's inept, thin-skinned governor is being touted as a potential vice-presidential nominee. As in second in command to the president. Of the United States.

Ye timbers shivering yet?

(One blogger even suggests Sonny run for president.)

Besides routinely embarrassing the state, I'm not sure exactly what Sonny has achieved as governor. Remember his letter to the editor last fall in which he complained about the AJC's coverage of his beloved Georgia Bulldogs?

From the front page to the business page and now to the sports page, it is as if the AJC gleefully awaits lousy news about all things Georgia and pounces with their poison pens whenever bad things happen to the good people of our state.

Other cities celebrate the successes and mourn the losses of local businesses, individuals and sports teams. The AJC takes the opposite position and — instead of boosterism — criticizes, investigates and ridicules all things Georgia.

The AJC, not UGA, is the real loser.

Sonny's suggested headline? "Our valiant Bulldogs lose courageously to hated Volunteers"

Determined to reinforce his image as a buffoon, Perdue this morning told conservative yakker Bill Bennett that dissenters should "keep your mouth shut" about Iraq.

"The president did not choose war. The president chose to protect the United States of America, and he did," Perdue said.

Mission accomplished, eh Sonny?